My name is Doug. I am one of the proud and few. I am also the most ill-informed of our team of five.
Last night at dinner with Jeff and Zephir (collectively, Jay-Z) I was informed that during this month of purification that my morning meals would be comprised solely of fruit. This was news to me...I'd given the book detailing our cleanse a 'cursory glance'...a phrase used most often by people whose ignorance has just been exposed at dinner parties. Case in point, me.
But I've been righted like a dim-witted child fallen from his tricycle...and now I pedal on.
Morning meal:
Lemon water (mmmmm!!)
Spent 20 minutes thinking about the five pounds of bacon in our freezer and then...
Cranberry Juice with Psyllium Husks (can we market this concoction as Psilly Cran?).
One glorious Pink Lady apple, a 1/4 of Cantaloupe and with that...
I was off to milk the goat and slaughter some lambs.
In the barn with my father-and-brother-in-law (I love hyphens and ellipses...) for three hours of throat-slitting, wool wrenching, gut-liberating fun...and all the while I didn't have a single hunger pang!
AND...no gas!
As of New Year's I began letting fruits and vegetables rule my world and it had led to some serious belly distention with accompanying trumpeting from mine arse. The book says that fruit eaten after other foods like oatmeal (my A.M. usual) sits in the belly too long and begins to putrify leading to aforementioned gastro-intentional ballistics...this morning I had none of those issues.
We've got our very own copy of the book right now (properly cited plug forthcoming) and I'm going to curl up with it this evening. Emily says dinner involves chickpeas and dry-roasted cumin...lookin' forward to it. There's more anticipation for meals now methinks.
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